I’ve visited a lot of different churches over the years. A few have required a head scarf. Some, something nicer than jeans. Most don’t care.

Mine was the generation to break traditional church dress codes, following on the heels of the hippies before us. It felt daring. Rebellious, even. Like we were laying aside the trappings of formal religion to uncover the heart of what it meant to follow Jesus. It wasn’t until I gained some maturity and humility though, that I recognized that in many churches, dressing up was a form of showing respect for God, not just an antiquated tradition.

But how does God want us to dress?

I think of times I worshipped him around campfires, in meadows and beaches. Holy times in stairwells and dorm rooms.

My churches have been cathedrals of pines. Dented folding chairs scraping on concrete slab. Easter sunrise at Inspiration Point. The swell and throb of a mighty organ filling sanctuaries lit by stained glass. And all of it was worship, no matter the setting. God meets his people in grand cathedrals, and also in spaces of consecrated ordinariness.

At one church, one older man set the rules. No shorts on stage. Or sandals. It was years before our pastor was able to shed his suitcoat. We wore our “Sunday best” in deference to his generation’s preferences, knowing that respect runs both ways.

In our next church, torn jeans and sweatshirts ruled the day, and that was fine too. I’m glad that we’ve come to the point of recognizing that honoring God comes from the inside, not the outer wrapping.

But what does the Bible say we should wear? There is no verse telling us the proper attire for church. Instead, it’s the heart that matters, both in church and outside of it.

The dress code we are called to adhere to is simply this: compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

Compassion—heartfelt and sacrificial. The kind that listens. That weeps. That shows up.

Kindness—genuine thoughtfulness. The kind that bears with rudeness and irritability. That goes out of its way. That remembers.

Humility—understanding and openhearted. The kind that withholds judgment. That cedes expectations.

Gentleness—approachable and open. The kind that makes allowances. That welcomes. That heals.

Patience—a safety of spirit. The kind that is longsuffering. That perseveres.

This is the dress code God is honored by.

The world may dress to impress, but God’s people should be the ones spreading out the red carpet, not posing on it.

Clothing matters, because it demonstrates respect or offers welcome into our places of worship. But the garments God looks for are worn inside, adorning a spirit that lives to love him and others.

Whether we are dressing for church or a trip to the grocery store, let’s remember to clothe ourselves with the garments that truly matter.

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Colossians 3:12